What Adjustments Have You Made to Help Prevent From Making Perceptual Mistakes Over Again?
2.iv Improving Perception
Learning Objectives
- Talk over strategies for improving self-perception.
- Hash out strategies for improving perception of others.
- Employ perception checking to improve perception of self and others.
Then far, we have learned about the perception process and how we perceive others and ourselves. Now we will turn to a discussion of how to improve our perception. Our self-perception tin can be improved by becoming aware of how schema, socializing forces, self-fulfilling prophecies, and negative patterns of thinking tin can distort our ability to describe and evaluate ourselves. How we perceive others can be improved by developing ameliorate listening and compassionate skills, becoming aware of stereotypes and prejudice, developing cocky-awareness through self-reflection, and engaging in perception checking.
Improving Self-Perception
Our self-perceptions tin and do change. Call up that nosotros accept an overall self-concept and self-esteem that are relatively stable, and we also take context-specific self-perceptions. Context-specific cocky-perceptions vary depending on the person with whom we are interacting, our emotional state, and the bailiwick matter being discussed. Becoming aware of the procedure of self-perception and the diverse components of our self-concept (which you have already started to do past studying this chapter) will help you understand and ameliorate your self-perceptions.
Since cocky-concept and self-esteem are so subjective and personal, it would exist inaccurate to say that someone's cocky-concept is "right" or "wrong." Instead, nosotros tin identify negative and positive aspects of cocky-perceptions also every bit discuss common barriers to forming authentic and positive self-perceptions. We can also identify common patterns that people experience that interfere with their ability to monitor, empathise, and modify their cocky-perceptions. Changing your overall cocky-concept or self-esteem is not an easy task given that these are overall reflections on who we are and how we judge ourselves that are constructed over many interactions. A variety of life-changing events can relatively quickly alter our self-perceptions. Think of how your view of cocky inverse when you moved from high school to college. Similarly, other people'south self-perceptions likely change when they enter into a committed relationship, have a child, brand a geographic motility, or beginning a new job.
Bated from experiencing life-changing events, we can make slower changes to our self-perceptions with concerted efforts aimed at becoming more competent communicators through self-monitoring and reflection. As you actively try to change your self-perceptions, do non be surprised if y'all run into some resistance from significant others. When you lot change or improve your self-concept, your communication volition also alter, which may prompt other people to respond to yous differently. Although you lot may have good reasons for changing certain aspects of your self-perception, others may get unsettled or confused by your irresolute behaviors and advice. Think, people try to increment predictability and subtract uncertainty within personal relationships. For example, many students begin to take their higher education more seriously during their inferior and senior years. As these students begin to change their self-concept to include the part of "serious educatee preparing to graduate and enter the professional person world," they likely have friends that want to maintain the "semiserious student who doesn't exert much consequent effort and prefers partying to studying" role that used to be a shared characteristic of both students' self-concepts. As the first student's beliefs changes to conform this new aspect of his or her self-concept, it may upset the friend who was used to weeknights spent hanging out rather than studying. Let'south now hash out some suggestions to aid avoid common barriers to authentic and positive self-perceptions and patterns of behavior that perpetuate negative self-perception cycles.
Avoid Reliance on Rigid Schema
As we learned earlier, schemata are sets of data based on cognitive and experiential knowledge that guide our interaction. We rely on schemata almost constantly to help us make sense of the earth around us. Sometimes schemata become so familiar that we utilise them as scripts, which prompts mindless communication and tin can lead us to overlook new information that may need to be incorporated into the schema. So information technology's important to remain mindful of new or contradictory information that may warrant revision of a schema. Being mindful is hard, however, especially since we oftentimes unconsciously rely on schemata. Think nearly how when you're driving a familiar route you sometimes fall under "highway hypnosis." Despite all the advanced psychomotor skills needed to drive, such every bit braking, turning, and adjusting to other drivers, we can pull into a familiar driveway or parking lot having driven the whole way on autopilot. Again, this is not necessarily a bad affair. But take you slipped into autopilot on a familiar route only to remember that yous are actually going somewhere else after yous've already missed your turn? This example illustrates the importance of keeping our schemata flexible and avoiding mindless advice.
Be Critical of Socializing Forces
We learned earlier that family, friends, sociocultural norms, and the media are just some of the socializing forces that influence our thinking and therefore influence our cocky-perception. These powerful forces serve positive functions simply can also fix into move negative patterns of self-perception. Two examples tin can illustrate the possibility for people to critique and resist socializing forces in gild to improve their self-perception. The first deals with concrete appearance and notions of health, and the second deals with cultural identities and bigotry.
We have already discussed how the media presents us with narrow and often unrealistic standards for attractiveness. Fifty-fifty though most of us know that these standards don't correspond what is normal or natural for the man body, we internalize these ideals, which results in various issues ranging from eating disorders, to low, to poor self-esteem. A relatively disregarded but controversial and interesting movement that has emerged partially in response to these narrow representations of the trunk is the fat credence movement. The fat credence motion has been around for more than thirty years, but information technology has more than recently gotten public attending due to celebrities like Oprah Winfrey and Kirstie Alley, who after years of publicly struggling with weight issues accept embraced a view that weight does not necessarily correspond to health. Many people have found inspiration in that message and have decided that being salubrious and stiff is more than important than being thin (Katz, 2009). The "Healthy at Every Size" movement and the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance have challenged the narrative put out past the 30-billion-dollar-a-year weight-loss industry that fatty equals lazy, ugly, and unhealthy.[i] Alien scientific studies make it difficult to say conclusively how strong the correlation is between weight and health, merely it seems clear that a view that promotes healthy living and positive self-esteem over unconditional dieting and a cult of thinness is worth exploring more given the potential public wellness implications of distorted body paradigm and obesity.
Cultural influences related to identities and difference tin also lead to distorted self-perceptions, especially for people who occupy marginalized or oppressed identities. While perception research has oft been used to support the notion that individuals who are subjected to discrimination, like racial and ethnic minorities, are likely to have low self-esteem because they internalize negative societal views, this is not always the instance (Armenta & Hunt, 2009). In fact, even some early on perception research showed that minorities do not just passively accept the negative views society places on them. Instead, they actively try to maintain favorable cocky-perceptions in the face of discriminatory attitudes. Numerous studies have shown that people in groups that are the targets of bigotry may place with their in-group more considering of this threat, which may actually assistance them maintain psychological well-being. In short, they reject the negative evaluations of the out-group and detect refuge and support in their identification with others who share their marginalized condition.
Beware of Cocky-Fulfilling Prophecies
Cocky-fulfilling prophecies are thought and activeness patterns in which a person's false conventionalities triggers a behavior that makes the initial fake belief actually or seemingly come true (Guyll et al., 2010). For example, permit's say a student's biology lab instructor is a Chinese person who speaks English language as a second language. The student falsely believes that the instructor will not be a good teacher because he speaks English with an accent. Because of this belief, the student doesn't nourish class regularly and doesn't heed actively when she does attend. Because of these behaviors, the pupil fails the biological science lab, which then reinforces her original belief that the teacher wasn't a good teacher.
Although the concept of self-fulfilling prophecies was originally developed to be applied to social inequality and discrimination, it has since been applied in many other contexts, including interpersonal communication. This enquiry has constitute that some people are chronically insecure, pregnant they are very concerned about being accustomed past others simply constantly feel that other people will dislike them. This tin can manifest in relational insecurity, which is again based on feelings of inferiority resulting from social comparison with others perceived to be more secure and superior. Such people oft finish up reinforcing their belief that others will dislike them because of the behaviors triggered past their irrational belief. Accept the following scenario equally an example: An insecure person assumes that his appointment will non like him. During the date he doesn't engage in much conversation, discloses negative information virtually himself, and exhibits anxious behaviors. Because of these behaviors, his date forms a negative impression and suggests they not see each other again, reinforcing his original belief that the appointment wouldn't like him. The example shows how a pattern of thinking can atomic number 82 to a pattern of beliefs that reinforces the thinking, and then on. Luckily, experimental research shows that self-affirmation techniques can be successfully used to arbitrate in such self-fulfilling prophecies. Thinking positive thoughts and focusing on personality strengths can stop this negative cycle of thinking and has been shown to have positive effects on bookish functioning, weight loss, and interpersonal relationships (Stinston et al., 2011).
Create and Maintain Supporting Interpersonal Relationships
Bated from giving yourself affirming messages to assistance with self-perception, it is important to find interpersonal back up. Although nearly people accept at least some supportive relationships, many people also have people in their lives who range from negative to toxic. When people find themselves in negative relational cycles, whether it is with friends, family, or romantic partners, it is difficult to interruption out of those cycles. But we tin all make choices to be around people that volition help united states of america be who we want to be and non be effectually people who hinder our self-progress. This notion can also be taken to the farthermost, however. Information technology would not be wise to surround yourself with people who merely validate you and do non constructively claiming you, considering this too could lead to distorted cocky-perceptions.
Beware of Distorted Patterns of Thinking and Acting
You lot already know from our give-and-take of attribution errors that we all take perceptual biases that distort our thinking. Many of these are common, and we often appoint in distorted thinking without being conscious of it. Learning about some of the typical negative patterns of thinking and acting may help u.s. acknowledge and intervene in them. One such design involves self-esteem and overcompensation.
People with low self-esteem may act in ways that overcompensate for their feelings of depression self-worth and other insecurities. Whether it's the businessman buying his midlife crisis Corvette, the "country boy" calculation monster tires to his truck, or the customs leader who wears several carats of diamonds everywhere she goes, people often plough to cloth possessions to try to boost self-esteem. While these purchases may make people experience better in the short term, they may accept negative financial effects that can exacerbate negative self-perceptions and lead to interpersonal conflict. People also recoup for self-esteem with their relational choices. A person who is anxious about his career success may surround himself with people who he deems less successful than himself. In this instance, being a big fish in a small-scale pond helps some people feel better nearly themselves when they appoint in social comparison.
People can besides become into a negative thought and action cycle by setting unrealistic goals and consistently not meeting them. Similar to a self-fulfilling prophecy, people who set unrealistic goals can stop up with negative feelings of cocky-efficacy, which as nosotros learned earlier, tin can negatively bear on self-esteem and cocky-concept. The goals nosotros set should exist challenging but progressive, meaning we piece of work to come across a realistic goal, then increase our expectations and gear up some other goal, and and so on.
Some people develop low cocky-esteem because they lack authentic data about themselves, which may be intentional or unintentional. A person can intentionally endeavour to maintain high cocky-esteem past ignoring or downplaying negative comments and behavior and focusing on positive evaluations. While this can be a good matter, it can also pb to a distorted cocky-concept. At that place is a heart basis between beating yourself up or dwelling on the negative and ignoring potentially constructive feedback nearly weaknesses and missing opportunities to grow as a person. Conversely, people who take low self-esteem or negative self-concepts may disbelieve or ignore positive feedback. To wrap up this section, I'd like to turn to one of my favorite shows and a great source for examples relevant to the perception process: American Idol.
I've always enjoyed showing clips from American Idol auditions in my course when I teach virtually self-perception. As you probably know, the flavor always starts with audition footage shot in various cities. The range of singing abilities, not to mention personalities, of those who bear witness upwards for a chance to sing in front of the judges leads millions of viewers to go on tuning in. While information technology's obvious that the producers let some people through who they know don't take a hazard at making it on the testify, they likewise know that certain personalities make for skillful reality telly viewing. I've ofttimes found myself wondering, "Do these people actually remember they can sing?" The answer is sometimes a very articulate "Yes!" Sure, some are in that location but to make a spectacle and hopefully make it on Television set, but there are many who actually believe they have singing abilities—even to the indicate that they challenge and discount the judges' comments.
During the contestant's tearful and/or angry postrejection interview, they are often shown standing with their family unit and friends, who are likewise surprised at the judges' decision. These contestants could potentially avert this emotional ending by following some of the previous tips. It'due south good that they have supportive interpersonal relationships, simply people's parents and friends are a footling biased in their feedback, which can atomic number 82 to a skewed cocky-concept. These contestants could likewise ready incremental goals. Singing at a local consequence or even at a karaoke bar might take helped them gain more accurate data near their abilities and led them to realize they didn't have what it takes to be an "American idol."
Overcoming Barriers to Perceiving Others
There are many barriers that prevent us from competently perceiving others. While some are more difficult to overcome than others, they tin all be addressed by raising our awareness of the influences effectually united states and committing to monitoring, reflecting on, and irresolute some of our communication habits. Whether it is our lazy listening skills, lack of empathy, or stereotypes and prejudice, diverse filters and blinders influence how we perceive and respond to others.
Develop Empathetic Listening Skills
Every bit we will acquire in Affiliate 5 "Listening", effective listening is not easy, and most of united states do non make a concerted effort to overcome common barriers to listening. Our fast-paced lives and cultural values that emphasize speaking over listening sometimes make listening feel like a chore. But we shouldn't underestimate the ability of listening to make someone else experience better and to open our perceptual field to new sources of information. Empathetic listening can too help us expand our self- and social awareness past learning from other people'southward experiences and taking on different perspectives. Empathetic listening is challenging because it requires cognitive and emotional investment that goes across the learning of a skill set.
I didn't know what a lazy listener I was until I started teaching and realized how much time and effort teachers accept to put into their jobs. Honestly, at first information technology was challenging to intently listen to student bug, thoughts, and questions, but I immediately saw the value in it. To be a proficient teacher, I had to get a amend listener. As a consequence, I also gained more empathy skills and became a lot more than patient. A valuable lesson I learned during this time is best stated as follows: "Everyone'south biggest problem is his or her biggest trouble." If 1 person's biggest problem is getting enough money together to buy a new jail cell phone and another person'south biggest problem is getting enough money together to go much needed medication, each of these people is probable experiencing a similar amount of stress. As an outsider, nosotros might look at this instance and think about how a cell phone isn't necessary to live but the medication is. Simply anybody's reality is his or her reality, and when you lot tin can concede that someone'southward reality isn't like yours and you are OK with that, then you have overcome a significant barrier to condign more than aware of the perception process.
I recently had a good pupil inform me that he was leaving school to pursue other things. He had given speeches about wildfire firefighting and beer brewing and was passionate about both of those things, but not school. As an academic and lover of and advocate for higher instruction, I wouldn't accept made that pick for myself or for him. But I am non him, and I tin can't assume his perceptions are consistent with mine. I retrieve he was surprised when I said, "I think you are a smart and capable adult, and this is your conclusion to make, and I respect that. School is not going anywhere, so it'll be here when you're ready to come up back. In the meantime, I'd be happy to be a reference for any jobs you're applying for. Simply allow me know." I wanted to go far articulate that I didn't perceive him as irresponsible, immature, misguided, or uncommitted. He afterwards told me that he appreciated my reaction that day.
Beware of Stereotypes and Prejudice
Stereotypes are sets of beliefs that we develop nigh groups, which we then apply to individuals from that group. Stereotypes are schemata that are taken too far, as they reduce and ignore a person's individuality and the multifariousness present within a larger group of people. Stereotypes can exist based on cultural identities, physical appearance, behavior, speech, beliefs, and values, among other things, and are often caused past a lack of information about the target person or group (Guyll et al., 2010). Stereotypes can be positive, negative, or neutral, merely all run the run a risk of lowering the quality of our advice.
While the negative effects of stereotypes are pretty straightforward in that they cheapen people and prevent the states from adapting and revising our schemata, positive stereotypes likewise take negative consequences. For example, the "model minority" stereotype has been applied to some Asian cultures in the United States. Seemingly positive stereotypes of Asian Americans as hardworking, intelligent, and willing to adapt to "mainstream" civilization are not e'er received as positive and can lead some people within these communities to experience objectified, ignored, or overlooked.
Stereotypes tin can besides pb to double standards that point to larger cultural and social inequalities. There are many more words to describe a sexually agile female than a male, and the words used for females are disproportionately negative, while those used for males are more than positive. Since stereotypes are generally based on a lack of data, we must take it upon ourselves to gain exposure to new kinds of information and people, which will probable crave u.s.a. to get out of our comfort zones. When we do meet people, we should base the impressions nosotros make on describable behavior rather than inferred or secondhand information. When stereotypes negatively influence our overall feelings and attitudes most a person or group, prejudiced thinking results.
Prejudice is negative feelings or attitudes toward people based on their identity or identities. Prejudice can take private or widespread negative effects. At the individual level, a hiring manager may not rent a young man with a physical disability (even though that would exist illegal if information technology were the only reason), which negatively affects that one man. Nevertheless, if pervasive cultural thinking that people with physical disabilities are mentally deficient leads hiring managers all over the country to make similar decisions, then the prejudice has get a social injustice. In some other example, when the disease nosotros know today every bit AIDS started killing big numbers of people in the early 1980s, response past some health and government officials was influenced by prejudice. Since the disease was primarily affecting gay men, Haitian immigrants, and drug users, the illness was prejudged to be a disease that affected just "deviants" and therefore didn't get the same level of attention it would take otherwise. It took many years, investment of much money, and didactics campaigns to aid people realize that HIV and AIDS do not prejudge based on race or sexual orientation and can bear on whatsoever human being.
Engage in Self-Reflection
A skillful way to improve your perceptions and increase your communication competence in general is to engage in self-reflection. If a communication meet doesn't go well and y'all want to know why, your self-reflection will be much more useful if you are aware of and can recount your thoughts and actions.
Self-reflection can also help u.s. increase our cultural awareness. Our thought process regarding culture is often "other focused," meaning that the culture of the other person or grouping is what stands out in our perception. However, the quondam adage "know thyself" is appropriate, as nosotros become more aware of our own culture by amend understanding other cultures and perspectives. Developing cultural self-awareness frequently requires us to get out of our comfort zones. Listening to people who are dissimilar from us is a fundamental component of developing self-cognition. This may exist uncomfortable, because our taken-for-granted or deeply held behavior and values may get less certain when we see the multiple perspectives that exist.
We can also go more aware of how our self-concepts influence how nosotros perceive others. We frequently hold other people to the standards we concur for ourselves or assume that their cocky-concept should be consistent with our own. For example, if you consider yourself a cracking person and recollect that sloppiness in your personal appearance would evidence that yous are unmotivated, rude, and lazy, then you are likely to think the same of a person you lot judge to have a sloppy appearance. Then asking questions similar "Is my impression based on how this person wants to be, or how I call up this person should want to exist?" can lead to enlightening moments of self-reflection. Request questions in general nigh the perceptions y'all are making is an integral role of perception checking, which we volition discuss side by side.
Checking Perception
Perception checking is a strategy to help us monitor our reactions to and perceptions about people and communication. There are some internal and external strategies nosotros can use to engage in perception checking. In terms of internal strategies, review the various influences on perception that we have learned about in this affiliate and always be willing to enquire yourself, "What is influencing the perceptions I am making correct now?" Fifty-fifty being aware of what influences are acting on our perceptions makes usa more aware of what is happening in the perception process. In terms of external strategies, we tin can use other people to aid verify our perceptions.
The cautionary adage "Things aren't always as they appear" is useful when evaluating your own perceptions. Sometimes it'south a good idea to bounce your thoughts off someone, particularly if the perceptions relate to some loftier-stakes state of affairs. Simply non all situations allow united states of america the chance to verify our perceptions. Preventable crimes have been committed because people who saw something suspicious didn't written report it even though they had a bad feeling well-nigh it. Of course, we have to walk a line between existence reactionary and existence too cautious, which is hard to manage. We all know that we are ethically and sometimes legally required to study someone to the police who is harming himself or herself or others, but sometimes the circumstances are much more uncertain.
The Tony Award–winning play Doubtfulness: A Parable and the Academy Award–winning movie based on it bargain with the coaction of perception, doubt, and certainty. In the story, which is gear up in a Bronx, New York, Catholic school in 1964, a immature priest with new ideas comes into the school, which is run past a traditional nun who, like many, is not fond of change. The older nun begins a campaign to get the young priest out of her school after condign convinced that he has had an inappropriate relationship with one of the male students. No conclusive evidence is offered during the course of the story, and the audition is left, equally are the characters in the story, to determine for themselves whether or not the priest is "guilty." The younger priest doesn't fit into the nun'south schema of how a priest should wait and act. He has longer fingernails than other priests, he listens to secular music, and he takes iii sugars in his tea. A series of perceptions similar this lead the nun to certainty of the priest's guilt, despite a lack of concrete prove. Although this is a fictional example, it mirrors many high-profile cases of abuse that have been in the news in contempo years. Hopefully nosotros will not find ourselves in such an uncertain and dire position, but in these extreme cases and more mundane daily interactions, perception checking can be useful.
"Getting Competent"
Perception Checking
Perception checking helps us dull downwards perception and communication processes and allows us to have more control over both. Perception checking involves being able to depict what is happening in a given state of affairs, provide multiple interpretations of events or behaviors, and inquire yourself and others questions for clarification. Some of this process happens inside our heads, and some happens through interaction. Permit'south have an interpersonal conflict as an example.
Stefano and Patrick are roommates. Stefano is in the living room playing a video game when he sees Patrick walk through the room with his suitcase and walk out the front end door. Since Patrick didn't say or wave proficient-adieu, Stefano has to make sense of this see, and perception checking can aid him do that. First, he needs to try to describe (not evaluate nonetheless) what just happened. This can be done by asking yourself, "What is going on?" In this example, Patrick left without speaking or waving good-adieu. Side by side, Stefano needs to think of some possible interpretations of what simply happened. One estimation could be that Patrick is mad virtually something (at him or someone else). Another could be that he was in a bustle and simply forgot, or that he didn't want to interrupt the video game. In this step of perception checking, it is practiced to be aware of the attributions you are making. You might endeavour to determine if you are overattributing internal or external causes. Lastly, you will want to verify and clarify. So Stefano might ask a common friend if she knows what might exist bothering Patrick or going on in his life that made him leave so all of a sudden. Or he may also simply want to call, text, or speak to Patrick. During this footstep, it'south important to exist aware of punctuation. Even though Stefano has already been thinking about this incident, and is experiencing some conflict, Patrick may accept no idea that his deportment acquired Stefano to worry. If Stefano texts and asks why he'due south mad (which wouldn't be a good idea because it'due south an supposition) Patrick may become defensive, which could escalate the disharmonize. Stefano could just describe the behavior (without judging Patrick) and ask for clarification by maxim, "When you left today you didn't say cheerio or permit me know where you were going. I just wanted to bank check to see if things are OK."
The steps of perception checking as described in the previous scenario are as follows:
- Footstep 1: Describe the behavior or situation without evaluating or judging it.
- Step 2: Retrieve of some possible interpretations of the behavior, existence aware of attributions and other influences on the perception process.
- Footstep 3: Verify what happened and ask for description from the other person's perspective. Be aware of punctuation, since the other person likely experienced the event differently than yous.
- Getting integrated: Give an example of how perception checking might be useful to you in academic, professional, personal, and civic contexts.
- Which pace of perception checking do you lot call back is the almost challenging and why?
Key Takeaways
- We can improve self-perception by avoiding reliance on rigid schemata, thinking critically about socializing institutions, intervening in self-fulfilling prophecies, finding supportive interpersonal networks, and becoming aware of cycles of thinking that distort our self-perception.
- We can improve our perceptions of others by developing empathetic listening skills, becoming aware of stereotypes and prejudice, and engaging in cocky-reflection.
- Perception checking is a strategy that allows united states of america to monitor our perceptions of and reactions to others and communication.
Exercises
- Which barrier(s) to cocky-perception exercise you think present the nearly claiming to you and why? What can you do to commencement to overcome these barriers?
- Which barrier(s) to perceiving others practise you think present the most challenge to you lot and why? What tin you practice to commencement to overcome these barriers?
- Recount a recent communication come across in which perception checking may have led to a more positive issue. What could yous have washed differently?
References
Armenta, B. Due east. and Jennifer S. Hunt, "Responding to Societal Devaluation: Effects of Perceived Personal and Grouping Discrimination on the Ethnic Group Identification and Personal Self-Esteem of Latino/Latina Adolescents," Group Processes and Intergroup Relations 12, no. 1 (2009): eleven–12.
Guyll, G., et al., "The Potential Roles of Cocky-Fulfilling Prophecies, Stigma Consciousness, and Stereotype Threat in Linking Latino/a Ethnicity and Educational Outcomes," Social Issues 66, no. 1 (2010): 116.
Katz, M., "Tossing Out the Diet and Embracing the Fat," The New York Times, July 16, 2009, accessed June vi, 2012, http://www.nytimes.com/2009/07/16/health/nutrition/16skin.html.
Stinson, D. A., et al., "Rewriting the Self-Fulfililng Prophecy of Social Rejection: Self-Affirmation Improves Relational Security and Social Behavior up to ii Months After," Psychological Science 20, no. x (2011): 2.
Source: https://open.lib.umn.edu/communication/chapter/2-4-improving-perception/